This week we took a look at some ways in which our inner world can become distorted from our external world, creating perceptions and beliefs we might not consciously realize, yet which have a strong influence over our behaviors and experiences (which then effect our perceptions and beliefs some more, and so on and so on).
From elephants to the inner sanctum of our beliefs.
We started off by considering how certain social constrictions may have created an elephant in the room around how much we share about our personal experiences during transition and change. We also looked at how we relate to the changes in our lives, and how our outer connection to our change can be misaligned with our inner connection of how we identify with that change.
Next we examined the case of Ruth, who received a promotion she wanted, and related to from an external standpoint (things like title, money, prestige, reward), yet internally she continued to identify with who she was in her former position (go-to problem solving person), which created behaviors that perpetuated that identity, resulting in experiences that exhibited a gap between her inner and outer worlds. Ruth’s perceptions of this gap turned into beliefs of failure and isolation, which she then reinforced in her behavior, thus creating more negative experiences, and so on.
Lastly we dug into a comment seemingly made in passing during an interview by author Gary Taubes that demonstrated a hidden belief about the need to engage in what he considers to be unhealthy habits while in the process of writing (the transition) in order to complete his new book (the change). We looked at how such a belief likely came to be, based on experiences, perceptions, beliefs and behaviors that were once again reinforced via a feedback loop.
A model in the making.
When I started this brief series, I had originally anticipated that I would focus on what I have observed as ways our perceptions and beliefs show up in our behaviors, and how we are often unaware of these connections we’re making between our inner and outer worlds. I thought about certain inner patterns that show up in behaviors such as:
Behold, the mindset feedback loop!
What surprisingly emerged from this weeks posts was a draft model which I’m already putting to use. Here’s the draft, which I’ve tentatively titled The Mindset Feedback Loop:
The draft incorporates most of the key points from this week's themes into the form of a feedback loop where:
It was a happy coincidence that a model took flight from this week’s topics, as there was no intention to do so, but I thought you might appreciate learning how it came to be and the end result. It is possible that you’ll see more of this model as I continue to apply it to various situations and begin to test it with others.
I hope you’ll join me for next week’s posts where I plan to focus on how to be intentional with our transition and change amidst the chaos of daily life.
About the Author
Megan Rounds, Ed.D. is owner and principle perculator of perculcha, llc.
All Changevolution Change & Vulnerability Choice & Change Finding Solace Internal/External Change Loop Making Change Stick Mindset Preparing For Change Reactions To Change Reflection Shoulds Smooth Transitions Social Side Of Change Time Tips & Tools Uncertainty
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